Bill's Bulletin Board
By Bill Rea

We'll start this week with a question that I'm sure is driving most of you right out of your minds.

Are you tired of this winter yet?

Tell me this isn't a sure sign of someone who couldn't think of anything else to write about this week.

But in answer to my own question, yes, I am very tired of this winter. In fact, I'm fed up to the teeth with it. It's driving me up a proverbial wall. I think it sucks.

I am Canadian. I've lived my entire life in this country, and apart from one week spent in Cuba more than 30 years ago, I have spent every day of every winter of my life within 200 miles of where I am right now. In other words, I should be used to this. But I'm still sick of this winter.

I didn't realize just how fed up I was until last Tuesday night. I was driving to an assignment along rather slick roads when I suddenly realized how little traction I really had. My car skidded several times. I came close to rear-ending a few people. On two separate occasions, I was convinced I was heading straight for a ditch. After more than a week, I still can't figure out how I managed to stay on the road.

Then something happened that I would have thought unthinkable. I turned around the first chance I got and headed back from whence I came.

"Forget the assignment," I thought to myself. "It's not worth getting killed for."

I have been doing this work for 24 years, and have driven through extremes of just about every weather condition you could name, including snow, fog, rain and hail. I've had cases where I couldn't see the hood ornament on my car, but I had never been in a situation in which I just decided to turn the car around and pack it in.

Imaging being frightened by weather at my advanced age!

No I just headed back to my office and worked from there (I wasn't frightened enough to take the night off).

The only other time I turned back because of weather was one night a couple of years ago when I was trying to get to Penetang to cover a junior C hockey game, but that case of chickening out was largely prompted by my wife, who was travelling with me. I had assured her that we should be able to get there without too much trouble, but I also promised her that if the roads got really bad, we would turn back. As it turned out, conditions were just fine, at least until we got to Barrie, then we ran smack into winter. It was at that point that I learned a hard lesson about my wife. Having made her a promise, I learned, to my astonishment, that she actually expected me to keep it.

Remind me not to go into politics.

So yes, driving conditions are the main reason why I'm sick of winter, but there are others.

And, as long as I'm in a bellyaching mood, I might as well add that I really don't enjoy getting into an ice-cold car every morning.

I also don't like having to start a day (be it a work day or otherwise) by shoveling out my driveway. But I have had to do that to many times this year. It's a terrific way to get a day off to a rotten start. And then to add insult to injury, most of those days have seen me having to shovel as soon as I get home in the evening.

So how much of this torture is one man expected to put up with?

The worst part is trying to sleep nights when they are calling for a lot of snow. I'm usually awake every couple of hours such nights, looking out the window to see if an especially early start is in order. Early starts like that have been required much too often this year.

About the only time when it was even remotely enjoyable was one Friday a couple of weeks ago, when my neighbour arrived home and started shoveling just as I was putting my shovel away after a job that was reasonably well done. I couldn't resist a bit of good natured gloating at his expense, as I headed inside. But I also had the good sense not to take it too far. My neighbour, after all, is bigger than me.

Now I have to point out in fairness that my wife has stepped up and pitched in a lot this year. Beth grew up on a farm, so before our marriage, the shoveling of her driveway consisted of someone attaching a plow to a tractor. Moving in with me entailed more of a lifestyle switch than just having to get used to my housekeeping skills (or lack thereof). There is no plow to attach to the tractor at our house (and no tractor either). Working a snow shovel took a bit of getting used to for the poor girl. The first couple of times she tried it, I told her she was holding it like it was a hockey stick. But she has persevered, and there have been several evenings this winter when I've come home ready to grab the shovel, and found the job has already been done. The only reason I don't try to rent out her shoveling services is she would probably put a shovel through my head if I tried it.

There are easier ways to make money, I guess.

I think we have all heard the news stories that the record for snow in February in the Toronto area has been surpassed this year. I have the sore muscles to know that is true. That's interesting, considering all we have been hearing about global warming and other sire environmental calamities.

But compared to the last couple of winters, this one has been pretty heavy.

There was an item in last Wednesday's Toronto Star, pointing out that with the exception of the 2004-05 season, this one has seen the most snow in years. And 2005 was the year we received that big freak snowfall April 3 (I got stuck twice that day).

So yes, in answer to my own question, I am tired of this winter.

A nice long thaw would really make my day. Actually, it would probably make my year.